Saturday, November 7, 2009

The Spiral

Chaos and insanity reigns. The world swirls around you. Dates and people and books and notes and formulas and theory and the pressure of succeeding -not just in these four subjects, but for the many more to come- converge into a continuum devoid of meaning or perspective.

You lose all your faith, hope and respect you had for those around you. They squander into insignificance; your relationship with them carrying little meaning, as they slowly decay into obscurity.

When those closest to you are farthest from you, when those you could always fall back on cannot support the weight of your most difficult burdens, when you realise no one will be there for you and no one can or will do a thing if and should you fail… not just this academic semester, but on all the greater vestiges of the would-bes of your grandiose life...

You will realise then, that you are truly all alone in all this, and no comforting words, or thoughts will bring you out of your own pathetic, miserable little grave.

You then wished you, along with all the other fucking little things around you, could just fall apart, crumble and silently vanish into the abyss, as the spiraling vortex sucks it all away.

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