Friday, May 14, 2010

Honesty

 
Another bottle of beer by the yellow lamp.

Another passing day.


Alcohol solves nothing they say, but fuck them: it sure as hell makes a difference. I know not the reason why I have managed to --over the past few days-- find so much peace, and so much serenity amidst so much uncertainty, the burgeoning amount of academic work notwithstanding.


I have also realised that so much of these “issues” have been my own doing: had it not been for my selfishness, my wanting the cake and eating it, all this would not be so.

Beneath this shell that perhaps pursues objectivity and rationale at a (somewhat) obsessive level lies an emotional core that isn’t always altruistic, nor cares or loves that much.

I guess inside, I’m just a menacing little kid after all.

But I’ll give you this: I’ve got the guts to admit it.
 

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