It always starts that way for me: an irritating discomfort in the throat, developing the next day into a full blown sore, fever, coughing, and vomiting --the works.
This latest bout is among the worse I’ve had this year; a nasty, searing fever that lasted for days, and the scorching pain that followed every gulp of matter as it passed through my throat.
The usual mix of antibiotics and paracetamol put me to sleep for the better half of those 48 hours, but during the times I was conscious, the one thought that wouldn't let me be was that of humanity’s obsessive addiction to
the drug.
Sweet, beautiful, timeless, and irrefutable: what and where would mankind be without you?
For you, and only you, we put ourselves through things of the most absurd kind. We force ourselves through all sorts of nonsense. We allow ourselves to be patronised, to be mocked in front of our very eyes. We shed, not just tears, but blood, skin, and our dignity.
To ensure a steady and undisrupted supply of you, we lie. We deceive and we manipulate. We sacrifice, we tolerate and we
submit. We let your blade cut deep into our hearts and souls, spewing insanities of every sort imaginable -ones every addict will know, and none will forget. The scars never fade; we carry them with us for the remainder of our lives.
As our addiction grows ever stronger with the passage of time, more and more of the drug we demand. But it matters not, for the drug is all that we want. It is, all that we need. And thus the suffering continues, with what joy the drug brings into our lives, and whatever amount of happiness it provides us with.
To ‘quit’ is easier said than done, for many have tried, but only a handful have and will ever succeed. The ending can play out in so many negative ways: a violent backlash, depression spanning the length months --sometimes years--, the shattering of self worth, of hopes and dreams, and in the most severe of cases, death.
But then again, there are always those who would move on as swiftly to the next syringe as they did the ones before, and to the ones after. The method of acquiring the drug, and precisely what drug is being acquired matters not to them, for the effect is the only thing of consequence.
Ultimately though, try as we may, no one can fully run away from the addiction. It is what is required of us. It is what
we require.
So go on, choose your syringe.
